While I was feeding our newborn, my husband abandoned me without dinner. I taught him a lesson he would never forget. I’m still crying. Five weeks ago, I delivered delivery, and my husband asked his mother to assist. Instead, she’s practically moved in, entertaining guests all the time and creating a mess, while I’m forced to balance cleaning, feeding, and changing diapers while getting very little sleep.
The final straw came yesterday night. I heard my husband and his mother watching TV downstairs as I was in the bedroom feeding our infant.
When I walked downstairs after finishing, I discovered the kitchen in disarray and the refrigerator empty. My mother-in-law casually responded, “Well, you didn’t come down, so we assumed you weren’t hungry,” when I inquired about supper. Then, smirking, my husband said, “Just tidy up the mess.
In any case, you don’t do anything here. I was devastated. Feeling worn out, alone, and now this on top made it seem like everything was collapsing. But then I had a really good idea. I contacted my mother after returning to the bedroom.
She had often volunteered to help, but my husband insisted that we didn’t require any assistance. He would say, “We’ve got it covered,” which suddenly seemed offensive. But I had had enough of his contemptuous demeanor that evening. Despite my tears, I told my mother everything, and she immediately said, “Pack your belongings and the baby’s necessities.” In an hour, I will be there.
I gently began gathering my things and fed my son one more time while I waited for her. I packed a few days’ worth of clothes, got his blanket, diapers, and wipes, and crept into the kitchen to get the last of the baby formula. My husband and his mother were still watching TV in the living room, blissfully oblivious to the impending change, so I stayed away from them.
I had barely finished packing when my mother arrived. We silently packed everything into her car after she gave me a firm embrace. I was on the verge of leaving when I suddenly had the confidence to return inside. My spouse turned and gave me a perplexed expression.
He asked, as like he hadn’t disregarded my demands for weeks, “Where are you going?”
I firmly said, “I’m leaving,” and I was surprised by how strong my voice was. “You wanted the mess cleaned up by me? Instead, I’m tidying up my own life. I refuse to be treated this way, and it’s obvious that you don’t value what I do.
He glanced between me and his mother, who had a smug look on her face and was obviously expecting this to be a bluff, and appeared surprised. He sneered, “You’re overreacting,” yet there was a tinge of doubt in his voice.
“Maybe I am,” I replied, “but I need help right now.” Kindness is what I need. And none of that is visible to me here. He and his mother were sitting in startled silence when I turned and left.
I felt more taken care of at my mom’s place throughout the course of the following few days than I had in weeks. My mother prepared meals, helped with the baby, and gave me some much-needed rest. I had genuine support for the first time, and I became aware of how much I had been lacking in my own house.
My spouse then arrived at my mom’s house on the third day, looking worn out and apologetic. His voice was lower than normal when he said, “Can we talk?”
He apologized as we sat in the living room, acknowledging that he had not realized how much he had taken me for granted. “I now realize that my mom was only making things worse, even though I thought she was helping. “I apologize; I was mistaken,” he stated in a genuine tone.
I inhaled deeply, the hurt and rage still burning but tempered by his words. “You must realize that this cannot occur once more. Instead of someone who ignores me, I need a partner. You must establish limits with your mother and genuinely assist me in parenting our child if we are to proceed.
With a solemn gaze, he nodded. “I promise that things will change; I understand. I’ll speak with my mother and let her know she can’t remain for as long as she desires. You are the most important member of our family.
We talked for a while, establishing limits and talking about how he could actually help me. I thought there might be hope at the end. We decided that if I thought that things would be different the next day, I would return home.
His mother was gone when I got back, and the house was cleaner than it had been in weeks. He prepared supper that evening for the first time in a long time, and we ate a peaceful, meaningful meal together. Even though it was only a tiny step, it seemed like a fresh start.
And ever then, I only needed to remind him of that night anytime he reverted to his old behaviors. He was aware that I wasn’t scared to leave again if he didn’t value me. We would both remember the lesson that had been taught to him.